When you look at this pic you can appreciate that I felt more dread about publishing this than I did about deciding to have potentially life threatening surgery.
It is incredibly hard to expose yourself in the most naked way possible, literally. You can hide nothing.
However it is done... for the planet to see and I suppose I can retain a shred of self respect by convincing myself that I have been out of action for pretty much a year now without being able to improve as a result of any of the on, off training I was able to do since it was so sporadic.
Accountability allows for no secrets...Once exposed the journey has begun and soon enough I will be able to post comparitive pics that will show significant improvement week by week as I dance towards being my best ever.
One month after my original surfing accident having spent a month in hospital flat on my back I found I had lost 22lbs/10kgs of muscle mass. One year later I have added 33lbs/15kgs primarily of lard.
Comfort eating tends to become top of mind when one is recovering from a serious injury and cannot train.
I am feeling good now and believe that I'm on the road back. I really believe that I can get back into peak condition during this shred.
I can write all I like about the pitfalls of disregarding health and fitness and very smugly admonish those who disregard the obvious signs of neglect....but I have to face the fact that the prime target for my sometimes 'in your face' style of writing is.....ME.
I sit here with renewed energy, committment, persistance and resiliance....I have climbed many mountains, I have fallen many times, but I have got up, dusted myself off, wiped the tears from my muddy cheeks and told myself through clenched teeth determination...I WILL NOT BE BEATEN, I WILL PREVAIL, and I WILL COME THROUGH BETTER THAN EVER BEFORE.
Although I am starting a new journey, I am near the end of the old one and as I shrug off the cloak of despair I don a new one of brilliant colours and hues and I look upwards with hands raised and say " Thank you that you walk with me and help me up when I fall."
3 comments:
Have been waiting to see a photo of you post-everything, and Dougal, I find that photo so much better than I expected. You look like you still, you are not emaciated, you look so alive...so am pleased with your stage right now. You are just so perfect for a new beginning, and know you´ll enjoy the trip to goal as much as anything. I wish you well. You are so amazing. Few in life would take the steps you are taking.....
Lynda
The planet can see what a real overcomer looks like! I speak as an undefeated Champion of the world. We all know that the "outside" can and does change.You already know this but I'll say it anyway, how you "look" at the moment has very little to do with who you really are and all that is on the "inside" that inspires, motivates, and impacts others. Nothing can ever take that away from you. So I for one marvel at what you have done and the style with which you have done it.
Thank you Lynda, I'm looking forward to the journey and having you along for the ride.
Carlos, my friend thank you so much, I am humbled by the words of a real Champion.
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